music: Cannibal Ox - Stress Rap : the Cold Vein (2001)

holy shit i am tweaking the fuck out. my heart is running the kentucky derby and as i type this my leg is involuntarily motioning up and down on it’s ball at a pace faster than i have known it to ever move. this is the opposite of fun. the antithesis of good. the epitome of shitty. but not matter how bad this is getting i know it will end, eventually, and it keeps me working through it. i also recognize this is simply the nicotine leaving my system … my body has yet to hit me with the caffeine, sugar, and what i assume will be most mentally challenging, pot withdrawals yet. that is not a fun prospect. my teeth couldn’t chomp this sugar free gum harder.

step one is still a step, right? stay posi.